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not elsa
@nicbjo
Probably the saltiest human in the world right now going to work in this weather
Retweet of status by @Kellylargesse
13.
not elsa
@nicbjo
@KaseyLeduc Idk I followed the directions on the "flower food" packet and it just...... happened.
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not elsa
@nicbjo
Bought myself flowers. Two hours later I killed them pic.twitter.com/xyNjmr29NN
not elsa
@nicbjo
There was just a hornet in my shower the entire time I was in there
not elsa
@nicbjo
Update: still feel like death is coming for me.
not elsa
@nicbjo
not broke, just bent pic.twitter.com/dMNJn1qDbd
Retweet of status by @anchoragebc
not elsa
@nicbjo
Things you get excited about as an adult: when your credit score goes up
Retweet of status by @lindsBtheG
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not elsa
@nicbjo
At halftime yesterday I said if the pats won I was going to start the Tom Brady diet today.
not elsa
@nicbjo
I hate when makeup companies use the term "matte gloss" if it's a gloss it's not matte, and if it's matte it's not a gloss.
not elsa
@nicbjo
Ik we have to be tolerant etc but if you care more about your tax bill than literal human beings you're a shitty person
Retweet of status by @cclancy12
not elsa
@nicbjo
Scott and Dan picked us up from the airport with a large order of breadsticks.
...but wait! There's more!
12.
fakhright
@fakhright
astaghfirullah peng.krim guaaaaaaaa..............a *salto sambil solat*
