23.
KillJöy
@phalguy
Fresh clean sheets on the bed and no one to help dirty them up.
Retweet of status by @SouthernSassy5
24.
KillJöy
@phalguy
The only thing thinner than Donald Trump's skin is this Denny's bacon.
25.
26.
27.
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29.
KillJöy
@phalguy
Yesterday was a good example that man can build & man can plan but if Mother Nature throws down some tornados man is insignificant
Retweet of status by @Mr_Friend_Zone
KillJöy
@phalguy
Dude if your automated DM thanking me for following is 10 paragraphs long (I counted) it's not going to work out
smh
smh
Retweet of status by @Mr_Friend_Zone
KillJöy
@phalguy
Welcome to Canada,
Here's the only assault rifle you are allowed to open carry.
*Hands you a Super Soaker
Here's the only assault rifle you are allowed to open carry.
*Hands you a Super Soaker
KillJöy
@phalguy
The inventor of the wheel
gets the fame -
but the real hero is the person
who put four of them together
gets the fame -
but the real hero is the person
who put four of them together
Retweet of status by @SteveKoehler22
KillJöy
@phalguy
Me: *swats at bug*
Crap I missed it
Brain: I'll be on alert and aware until you kill it
Body: shall I get itchy every few seconds?
Brain:
Crap I missed it
Brain: I'll be on alert and aware until you kill it
Body: shall I get itchy every few seconds?
Brain:
Retweet of status by @Carolulu88
30.
31.32.
33.
KillJöy
@phalguy
[during sex]
*makes Transformers transforming sound effect while changing positions*
*makes Transformers transforming sound effect while changing positions*
Retweet of status by @cbdoubleu
KillJöy
@phalguy
Retweet me how you want to be retweeted
-twitter love story
-twitter love story
Retweet of status by @HolycrapitsaKat
KillJöy
@phalguy
[Canadian war room]
*United States invasion plan:
Gun control
Lululemon yoga pants
Tim Horton's on every corner
Sir, we're on schedule.
*United States invasion plan:
Gun control
Lululemon yoga pants
Tim Horton's on every corner
Sir, we're on schedule.
...but wait! There's more!
23.
fakhright
@fakhright
astaghfirullah peng.krim guaaaaaaaa..............a *salto sambil solat*
