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@_xopma
I'm obsessed with my best friends baby & I'm not sorry one bit look at that little smile pic.twitter.com/uhNQjckZIu
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@_xopma
On today's episode of Why My Child Cried: I refused to let her eat a piece of paper
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@_xopma
If ur watching my kid and send me constant picture updates without me asking u the real MVP
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@_xopma
Some guy requested we have our baddest bitch deliver their pizza the other day and I sent Mark. He's like 69 and wears a fanny pack.
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@_xopma
Dang, we created a perfect mini human pic.twitter.com/dL2loNLqGJ
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@_xopma
I am fucking psycho and I suggest these hoes not test my patience
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@_xopma
this will be my kid someday pic.twitter.com/dJxTsjHIUH
Retweet of status by @shopivoryella
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@_xopma
This whole what do I look like I do for a living is annoying AF
Retweet of status by @machinegunlacey
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@_xopma
I love when people lie to my face, it's totes my fav
...but wait! There's more!
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fakhright
@fakhright
astaghfirullah peng.krim guaaaaaaaa..............a *salto sambil solat*
