1.
ₑ៴ⁱₐⁿ
@callmeEvian
This what’s wrong with y’all attitudes today... pic.twitter.com/smnvJ93nco
2.
ₑ៴ⁱₐⁿ
@callmeEvian
i thought this was supposed to be coitus, it's more like coityou
Retweet of status by @notgeoffiep
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ₑ៴ⁱₐⁿ
@callmeEvian
- weigh kids on bathroom scale
- put each kid on toilet
- weigh kids again
- science lesson:
- put each kid on toilet
- weigh kids again
- science lesson:
Retweet of status by @HenpeckedHal
evianescence
@callmeEvian
Why stuff her stocking this year when you could stuff...
her heart?
her heart?
Retweet of status by @MissSassy_Pants
evianescence
@callmeEvian
I hope you read this as ZERO MILLION, ZERO HUNDRED THOUSAND ZEROTY ZERO, ZERO HUNDRED ZEROTY ZERO DOLLARS & ZERO CENTS
evianescence
@callmeEvian
@HenpeckedHal Ok I’ll have two suitcases for you
evianescence
@callmeEvian
@HenpeckedHal is it’s like someone farted in the mask?
Cuz it was me.
Cuz it was me.
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𝚎𝚟𝚒𝚊𝚗𝚎𝚜𝚌𝚎𝚗𝚌𝚎
@callmeEvian
Me, single: multiples, huh?
Me, a parent: multiples, huh?
Me, a parent: multiples, huh?
Retweet of status by @VisionBored1
𝚎𝚟𝚒𝚊𝚗𝚎𝚜𝚌𝚎𝚗𝚌𝚎
@callmeEvian
Balloons are weird...
Who knew a child could get so excited by a sack of stale breath
Who knew a child could get so excited by a sack of stale breath
Retweet of status by @vodkaqueen6969
evianescence
@callmeEvian
Me as a kid: is afraid to leave a leg out when sleeping.
Me as an adult: leaves ass out on purpose
Me as an adult: leaves ass out on purpose
Retweet of status by @VexingVixxen
evianescence
@callmeEvian
ITINERARY: LAJacksonville
ININETYERARY: SeattleBoston
ININETYERARY: SeattleBoston
Retweet of status by @TuSoonShakur
...but wait! There's more!
1.
fakhright
@fakhright
astaghfirullah peng.krim guaaaaaaaa..............a *salto sambil solat*
