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kelly oxford
@kellyoxford
Just logged on for first time today, read “bean dad” three times and now I’m logging off.
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kelly oxford
@kellyoxford
When you let out a quiet, non-lethal fart and your jeans get looser.
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kelly oxford
@kellyoxford
FYI: GenX loves being ignored! That’s always been our thing!!!!
kelly oxford
@kellyoxford
@johnlevenstein YOU WERE A TROPHY WIFE
kelly oxford
@kellyoxford
Publishers Weekly today!
I have two upcoming novels. I’m so grateful I can work from my bed. pic.twitter.com/eWs25g76X5
I have two upcoming novels. I’m so grateful I can work from my bed. pic.twitter.com/eWs25g76X5
kelly oxford
@kellyoxford
Parents: This is gonna be the longest month* of our lives.
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kelly oxford
@kellyoxford
Funny how u put all that thought into ur first & second tattoos but after that it’s like . Give me a Bart Simpson head, IDK.
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kelly oxford
@kellyoxford
Good god, I hope y’all like my movie.
kelly oxford
@kellyoxford
I’m still sitting here thinking about how close Lady Gaga and Bradley Cooper’s faces were at that piano.
kelly oxford
@kellyoxford
When you’re laying with your dog and it’s so chill and nice and then he decides to lick his dick.
kelly oxford
@kellyoxford
FKA twigs and Shia LeBeouf are dating? We def ship them as SHITWIGS.
...but wait! There's more!
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fakhright
@fakhright
astaghfirullah peng.krim guaaaaaaaa..............a *salto sambil solat*
