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MaritalBliss&!?$;:-(
@midlifecrisisfl
'You're a mean one, Mr Insomnia," (sung in the tone of The Grinch the Stole Christmas Theme song"
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MaritalBliss&!?$;:-(
@midlifecrisisfl
I can't ....
Currently in a LoVe triangle between Pizza and Beer "" pic.twitter.com/qZDxp8zOPN
Currently in a LoVe triangle between Pizza and Beer "" pic.twitter.com/qZDxp8zOPN
Retweet of status by @isonepower
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MaritalBliss&!?$;:-(
@midlifecrisisfl
Me today to my attorney: Well what the hell do you mean I can't bring my Twitter Crush to the divorce mediation hearing?
MaritalBliss&!?$;:-(
@midlifecrisisfl
Me: Forgive me father 4 I have sinned. I tweeted on Sunday
Father: U R forgiven. PS: don't stop. I need a good laugh between services.
Father: U R forgiven. PS: don't stop. I need a good laugh between services.
MaritalBliss&!?$;:-(
@midlifecrisisfl
Texted instead of & now I have to back track about how much I love folding laundry to my police officer neighbor.Hubs is gonna love this
Retweet of status by @AmyEliza1013B
MaritalBliss&!?$;:-(
@midlifecrisisfl
Can't sleep.... Both sides of my pillow are warm
Retweet of status by @Birdhumms
MaritalBliss&!?$;:-(
@midlifecrisisfl
Spent my Friday nights of youth watching Dukes of Hazzard. Spending them now spitting out sarcastic drivel over the Twitter. Hmmmm????
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MaritalBliss&!?$;:-(
@midlifecrisisfl
Inviting all my followers 2 my van down by the river for an intervention. I'm serving Corn Dogs & Peppermint Schnapps. See u in a bit!
MaritalBliss&!?$;:-(
@midlifecrisisfl
@thequeensheart well then, you picked the wrong person to stay with.
MaritalBliss%^£¥/@:(
@midlifecrisisfl
@LPrizwan cake must be chocolate frosting. Them the rules. . (looks unsuccessfully for gavel Emoji)
...but wait! There's more!
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fakhright
@fakhright
astaghfirullah peng.krim guaaaaaaaa..............a *salto sambil solat*
