1.
Ted Travelstead
@trumpetcake
Found this on my car. pic.twitter.com/5KNRhtAbpa
2.
Ted Travelstead
@trumpetcake
BREAKFAST BURRITO RECIPE: fill compression sock with raisins and Play-Doh, bang it on diner counter until they bring you eggs, bacon, juice
Retweet of status by @trumpetcake
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
Ted Travelstead
@trumpetcake
Often while folding laundry Iβll put on a little music to liven things up.
Ted Travelstead
@trumpetcake
@eafreem Sending now.
Ted Travelstead
@trumpetcake
Terrible evening yesterday. Mother feigned interest in my Bop-It! as she held it at arm's length like a dirty diapβ¦ twitter.com/i/web/status/1β¦
Ted Travelstead
@trumpetcake
Grated a candle onto my nachos.
Ted Travelstead
@trumpetcake
Sad that weβll never know whoβs eaten the most buttons. No monument for that kind of thing.
8.
9.
10.
11.
Ted Travelstead
@trumpetcake
Playing Kickball on Zoom is turning out to be pretty expensive.
Ted Travelstead
@trumpetcake
Made my own bleach out of moonbeams and ham sweat, but the ratios have to be perfect or else you turn into a merman.
Ted Travelstead
@trumpetcake
Mother threw away my Daughtry albums.
Ted Travelstead
@trumpetcake
An openhanded slap from the beekeeper hurts more than any bee sting. Terrance I'll never forgive you.
...but wait! There's more!
1.
fakhright
@fakhright
astaghfirullah peng.krim guaaaaaaaa..............a *salto sambil solat*
